I slip into my jeans in the morning. I can see my feet. I can't wear a graphic T-shirt or anything yet, but my clothes are looking much better. By the end of the day it looks like I am hiding a basketball under my top or a beer belly.
I have no idea what is up with the expanding belly. I have even measured my waist in the morning and by 3PM it can be three inches bigger. No, joke. I know this because I have measured it and its like there is this inflating balloon that just pumps up all the sudden and my panties roll down at the same time. So, totally uncomfortable and it really annoys me and is very uncomfortable. I wish I could wear a thong again. Thongs don't roll down. However, I am way to old and way to fat to wear a thong. I just could not to that to any emergency workers that would happen to rescue me on the street. Way to traumatizing for everyone involved.
It does not matter how much weight I loose or what I am eating, it happens every day not matter what. I have come to call my afternoon friend, Fred my flabby friend.
By the morning Fred is gone and the whole process starts all over again. I have been talking to women around my age and it seems to be a trend for a lot of us. Of course, there are those who have won the genetic lottery and their stomachs remain flat and trim. In theory I am happy for them but in reality I hate them.
So, I ask you, do any of you out there have this evening tummy thing? I am curious. Because I literally have to change my clothes in the evening from pants with a waist and button to yoga pants. Not that I don't love my yoga pants but really?
So, far middle age sucks ass and I hate it. The only good thing so far is that my daughter is no longer stealing my socks because she does not live here. I finally have matching socks all the time. That is the only good thing about middle age so far. However, I think I would rather have my daughter here and have mismatched socks. The only good thing is really not that good.
I mean, the thickening body, the aches, the pains, the strange woman body processes, the memory weirdness and everything else that goes along with it because I am middle aged and I have forgot to write it down. Old age is looking worse and worse. Who wants this crap. Not me. Do you?
I am glad I decided a long time ago that I refused to be an old person. OK, I know I have no choice but I am not going down without a fight. Haha, sure. I am going to be the little old lady who is the frailest of them all. Yay, me.
Alright, I am kidding, kinda. I can see how women get all addicted to plastic surgery and wear inappropriate younger clothes and stuff like that. I can see that now. I won't be that girl, I will be the best older girl I can be but really really pissed about it.
If I could have a cause to fight against this would be it. Middle and old age instead of all the other crap that is out there. I could picket this and feel good about it. Hell no, Middle age, I won't go!!!
Bah!!! There is nothing that can be done but to just let it happen with has much grace and humor as possible. I suppose that is the best I can do. Maybe just one picket sign for fun. Sigh.
It does not matter how much weight I loose or what I am eating, it happens every day not matter what. I have come to call my afternoon friend, Fred my flabby friend.
By the morning Fred is gone and the whole process starts all over again. I have been talking to women around my age and it seems to be a trend for a lot of us. Of course, there are those who have won the genetic lottery and their stomachs remain flat and trim. In theory I am happy for them but in reality I hate them.
So, I ask you, do any of you out there have this evening tummy thing? I am curious. Because I literally have to change my clothes in the evening from pants with a waist and button to yoga pants. Not that I don't love my yoga pants but really?
So, far middle age sucks ass and I hate it. The only good thing so far is that my daughter is no longer stealing my socks because she does not live here. I finally have matching socks all the time. That is the only good thing about middle age so far. However, I think I would rather have my daughter here and have mismatched socks. The only good thing is really not that good.
I mean, the thickening body, the aches, the pains, the strange woman body processes, the memory weirdness and everything else that goes along with it because I am middle aged and I have forgot to write it down. Old age is looking worse and worse. Who wants this crap. Not me. Do you?
I am glad I decided a long time ago that I refused to be an old person. OK, I know I have no choice but I am not going down without a fight. Haha, sure. I am going to be the little old lady who is the frailest of them all. Yay, me.
Alright, I am kidding, kinda. I can see how women get all addicted to plastic surgery and wear inappropriate younger clothes and stuff like that. I can see that now. I won't be that girl, I will be the best older girl I can be but really really pissed about it.
If I could have a cause to fight against this would be it. Middle and old age instead of all the other crap that is out there. I could picket this and feel good about it. Hell no, Middle age, I won't go!!!
Bah!!! There is nothing that can be done but to just let it happen with has much grace and humor as possible. I suppose that is the best I can do. Maybe just one picket sign for fun. Sigh.
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