Sorry I have been missing for a week or so. My best intention was to blog while I was on vacation. Didn't happen. I was visiting my family in Texas. I wanted to blog. I really did. I was just to tired. Family tends to do that to a person. Well, me anyway. If your different, then please tell me your secret.
I started my journey on Thursday morning. My BFF and I hopped in the car and headed towards Texas. Two days later we were there. Tired and worn out. I dropped her off at her destination and then I headed down the street to mine.
Our plan was to each visit our prospective family members and then hook up at the end of the week. The goal was to rest and hang with our families. Goal was basically achieved.
I managed to find my way to my cousins house and found my cousin and her family just finishing dinner. My Auntie was there as well. I need to explain the family dynamics. My Aunt was raised by my mom and my cousin was raised by my mom and my aunt. So, I think of them as my sisters. I know, it is kinda confusing.
My cousins kids call me aunt and it gets a little messy when explanations are necessary. I stopped trying to explain the family to people and just go with it.
Anyway, after a day or two my sister/cousin and I decided we needed to get sister tattoos. We thought that it was a fantastic idea. I have no idea what possessed us to do this but we were determined.
My cousin/sister found this sister saying and we decided that we wanted to split up the saying and put it on the top of our feet and have it inside a half of heart on each foot.
So, we headed to the Stockyard in Dallas/Fort Worth and go to this tattoo place that is supposed to be the best place "ever" for tattoos. We get there and it is not open. We were the saddest sisters ever. What were we to do?
Did you know that at the stockyard you can drink an adult beverages on the street? It is true. I had no idea. I was a bad girl. My sister and I partook in the largest beers I have ever seen and drank them on the street. In about five minutes I was beyond drunk and walking on a public street. I know, I was bad. You can admonish me, if you want but what is done is done.
I found myself on a bench in front of a tattoo parlor with my sister looking at our phones for the saying that neither of us thought to bring. Then we saw it. The two stick figures with tin cans on a string. It was like we were building forts and talking to each other all over again.
I was like...YES!! This is it. Lets do this. My sister was not really into it but she liked the concept. Then all the sudden she had this amazing idea. Her idea was to throw her phone in my face with a minion on it. Yes, a minion, she wanted us to put minions on our bodies to represent each of us as sisters and instead of holding a tin can each of us would be holding bullhorn. We tend to be very loud. I look at her she looks at me. Hell Yes!! We were convinced these were going to be the most perfect tattoos "ever". How awesome would that be. Two minions that would look like us yelling at each other with bullhorns. Nothing better.
Then, I found the minion that was purple. You know the one that is all crazy looking with big hair. Yes, I told my sister this is you. You are always cranky and kinda insane with a touch of scary. I nodded my head and looked at her. I was giving her my mischief smile and lowering and raising my eyebrows at her. My sister was not amused. She was laughing and hitting my arm and was so not happy with me at the same time. What are sisters for but to tease each other and point out the perfect picture depicting the minion the captures your true essence.
My Sister then found my minion. This minion had church lady hair, pearls, rubber gloves and a daisy dress. I almost fell over laughing. This was the perfect minion. I had to admit, if you put a label maker in her hand, some lipstick and boobies it would be me. When it's you it's you. Sigh.
My sister wanted a different minion. Even though the purple one was perfect. A snarly, mean and cranky minion, I still say her perfect match. She found one that had a strapless bra, polka dot skirt and a high scraggly ponytail. OK, I agreed, not really her but close enough and funny. Funny is very important to both of us.
By the time we decided what minions would do it for us we had traversed the stockyard with our legal beers. I had noticed that the beers were as big as our heads. I don't know, if I mentioned this or not to my sister. We went into a shop called Pinky's. I had to look at a shop called Pinky's in a place that lets you walk around with adult beverages and where cows can roam the streets. It seemed like a must do. By this time we were beyond tipsy and any minion we showed each other was making us hysterical with laughter. Oh, Pinky's is a great store. It is a boutique for women with cute stuff. Check it out next time your in Dallas/Forth Worth but make sure you experience it with an adult beverage.
Once we were out on the street and the tattoo parlor was still not open, we were beyond helpless with giggles and showing each other our phones with different minions was not helping. I realized I had to go potty. Now, I don't know about any of you but my bladder is a mess at my current age. When I have to tinkle, I have to tinkle. I found myself with a beer in my hand on a street where cows walk and needing to pee, like right now. I cross my legs like a four year old and do the potty dance/walk thing to the open bar across the street. The whole time I am laughing and trying not to wet myself.
I managed not to make a puddle but there was a little whoops involved. I am sure Heavenly Father punished me for partaking in a very large beer but at that point I really didn't care. We were in a bar and by the time I got out of the ladies potty, my cousin had ordered another. Well, OK then, Cheers!!!
We staggered over to the tattoo parlor and it was open. YAY!!! Finally!!! Both of us were so very happy. We show that tattoo dude our idea. He is really excited to do it. He says that he thinks the tin cans is funnier and we agree. He draws it all out and then he gives us the price. $250.00 each. Holy Crap!!. I give my sister my Ricky Ricardo eyes of surprise. I shake my head and say no way. I tell her we need to be responsible adults. My husband would kill me. I was thinking $100.00 tops. Maybe $150.00 no higher, I ask the guy do you take credit cards? He says nope. I look at my cousin with that look like no friggin way.
The tattoo dude says he can do it for $200.00 each. I knew I had that much cash and agree but my cousin needed to get permission to spend that much from her husband. She sends a text and gets a definitive NO WAY!! That was that. We were sober and sad in about five minutes. No sisters tattoos for us.
In the end I am glad we didn't do it...yet. We get back to her house and decide to "save our egg money". I tend to visit them every year so I can make sure I put a little stash cash away for our sister tattoos and then our husbands can come and watch us be in pain while the tattoo guy puts the needle to us. I am pretty sure our husbands would enjoy that.
I have some more Texas stories to tell and I will get around to it.
Nice to be back.
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